Love and Loss
by sawthepanda
Summary: Death's thoughts about his love for Empress Elisabeth as he did everything to get her.


Death has never seen himself as good or bad. Over the time, he has fulfilled his duties, taking the lost souls. No matter how people begged and cried, he had no remorse.

And then he met her.

A young princess, unaware of the dangers the world had for her, unaware of the cruelty of mankind. Naïve as she was she just had the wish of freedom and independence. He remembers the first time seeing her, dancing along a high wire.  
Falling.  
He remembers how she had looked at him, the shade of a smile around her lips as she fell unconscious. He knew that he had fallen for her at this very moment. He desired her. Never before had someone had the power to bewitch Death.

So he stayed near her, observing how she became a strong woman. He was there when she met him, her all-beloved husband. At the glorious wedding, he was just one of the guests, good enough for one dance.

And hell, he made everything out of it.

He was there, when the problems started. How could they be such fools and try to force this spirited empress into a royal behaviour? Couldn't they see that they broke her nature, damaged her soul? On the other side he was laughing. The more they hurt her, the closer she got to him. He knew that she was longing for him, that she sought his releasing embrace. But he also knew that he had to wait, to stand aside, watch the masquerade and wait.

The first years of her marriage passed. When her first child came he waited for the opportunity to take it. Others followed. She fought for them, eager to raise them herself but without the proper knowledge. Her daughter had been weak from the beginning, so she died. The young empress blamed herself, begged him for mercy. Her pride had killed her beloved child. He had to do his job, was gleeful at the thought that he had won a bit of her.  
But after seeing her suffering he felt something. Not exactly remorse, but there was something touching his cold, death heart like a tiny spark, the beginning of an enormous flame of passion.

She was angry with him and did everything to deny their attraction. She did everything to be the perfect well-behaved empress everyone wanted her to be. She tried to love her husband and children with all her might. Did everything for her beauty to be the most beautiful woman in Europe and in Death's eyes she succeeded. Not just her looks, but her young independent heart was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.  
Time passed and she grew older but still had a young soul, compared to the ancient Death.  
As the days, months and years passed by, she travelled around. There were dozens of people accompanying her, serving her day and night. But never had she felt so lonely. He could sense the ache of her heart, the loneliness of her mind, but he knew that he had to wait. The time hadn't come yet.  
He watched as everything broke down and despite the spark in his heart he enjoyed it. It was a game he played, whatever happened to her, he was there. He watched with a sly smile in his face as her son Rudolf died, helped him to pull the trigger with excitement.  
He had her at that point. After years and years of waiting and aching for her heart, he had it. She was there on her knees, begging him to take her, to release her.  
He enjoyed her suffering, would have loved to take her with him. But inside he knew that it should not be out of desperation.  
He left her and continued waiting, knowing that they would see each other soon.

Then the day had come. Murder under unlucky conditions, or was it fate? One wrong movement, caused by an unworthy man. Her time to go had come. There wasn't much left to bind her to the world of living, she was a ghost of the woman she had once been.

Her time had come.

The last seconds of breathing, the proud, dismissive smile on her lips and these wise eyes of hers, were the most memorable things he had ever seen.  
He had enfolded her in his arms, as he bent down to kiss her.

It was true; Death had loved Elisabeth despite his cruel intentions. Still loved her. He could not change who he was, or what purpose he had on earth. But this extraordinary woman was the closest link to humankind he had ever had.


End file.
